Monday things for what it may be worth? What’s words worth anyway? That’s a quote from the rasping raw-throated man from Iron Fist and the Hordes From Hell from back before they gentrified the Roundhouse I’ll have you know (I suppose you could say at least they didn’t knock it down, knocked the soul out of it though! Knocking the soul out of everything now, words are worth nothing, hard working families, we’re all in it together, pay attention at the back, stand up straight).

Monday things then, the in-box is piled up with PR poop again, Eleven minutes past eleven,  shall we have a listen to this new Hawk Eyes album? The Leeds band never quite lived up to that early Chickenhawk adventure,  the early days promised so much more than the safety harness that came with the name change, they kind of cashed it all in for the cover of a glossy magazine, why did they do that, who got in their ear? This new album Everything Is Fine, due out in the new year, is pretty standard, pretty slick, pretty harmless, decent enough, modern alternative rock that, without being anything that bad, really doesn’t challenge anything much, more indifferent “stuff” and I guess if Foo Fighter shaving foam music is the best that you can get, if the compromise of conformity satisfies your needs and the glossy world of Kerranghammer, that shouty bloke from Radio One and what the Reading Festival has become now serves your purpose then Hawk Eyes are compromised enough for you. Surely it doesn’t always have to be watered down? Hell no, beware! The best bands don’t water it down, the best bands don’t treat you like a dumb consumer when they serve up their new release, music doesn’t have to compromise.

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I guess everything has to be watered down for mass consumption in the end doesn’t it? Sanitised easy to digest fast food rock music, the nice neat compromise of so-called street art, the lack of consideration that is canned dog food music, dried cat food art, of Ford Cortinas, a new print release just in time for Christmas and the rest of the baggage that comes with the monkey of expectation riding on the back of the random man on the radio talking about his latest play right now.  Throwing on this and that, click on the link in press release full of hyperblab and more you should like this because the big glossy mag likes it and so does the man from BBC6music and you better damn well cover it double quick or you’re going to look uncool, more bands that sound like Foo Fighterpoop, has there even been a band so consistently disappointing as those Foo Fighters?. Hang on, here’s another, some band called Undermine (from buttflip, New Jersey) who want us to tell you about something or other, well it doesn’t matter what they want us to tell you really if that’s all they’ve got, no, we don’t want to take your hand and be your superhero.. Here, here’s a “nice” Christmas tune from Maps and Polly Scattergood while we wonder what happened to all that Liars stuff and suck on some humbugs.

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Meanwhile some self proclaimed post-punk band from Norwich have a new album in March, hang on through, the press release for the band we’re pretty sure you’ve never heard of says the news is embargoed until 6pm tonight so we can’t tell you any of this right now, you’re going ot have to wait until teatime!  Gawd, the world is waiting for that one eh? Can any of us stand the tension until the clock slowly clicks around to 6pm? Pretty sure the BBC will break in to the evening news to tell you about the new album from Darwin and The Dinosaur at 6.01pm tonight, no need for us to tell you about their generic heard it all before pop-post-nothing-heard-it-a-million-times-already by numbers here, can we wait until it actually comes out in March? Surely there will be lines of people waiting at midnight along Oxford Street on actual release date? Can we actually wait until 6pm to tell you about it? Embargoed! What d’ya mean, the BBC didn’t mention it? Sky news? No? Really, never mind Darwin, how much do you pay that PR company to send out this bulshit? Answers on a postcard to someone who cares while we consider the proper challenge of JG THIRLWELL performing at London’s Cage Oto, tomorrow, Tuesday

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Thank gawd for Cafe Oto! Hang on, forget Cafe Oto or JG Thirwell, forget that hot embargoed news from that massive stadium band from Norwich, forget everything else, apparently, according to this press release e.mail right here, this is something new from the best unsigned band in the UK right now.  Can ALL you music-pimping PR companies, if you haven’t got anything decent to offer, stop cluttering up our day with this time-wasting poop please.  Jeez, here’s another one – “Embargoed until 6pm GMT” So we can’t tell you that “Post-Punk Trio, I, The Lion Have Announced The Details Of Their New EP – Run”. The Cheltenham band aren’t too bad actually, nothing that excited us that much, but if you like your formulaic indie-whatever-you-call-it-punk-pop, then I guess they’re just about okay. We’ll probably never mention them on these pages again, but hey, they can’t help the annoying dumbass press release poop that’s posted out on their behalf   Enough of all this, oh no, hang on, here’s moe,  “Hi there, We are *****’ mainly based in Lancashire and we have just released our debut EP! So was wondering if we could possibly get some amazing air time with you guys at all?”  No! Here, here’s some JG Thirwell and a few things that are words worth….

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